Are We Terrorists?

Am I a terrorist? I abhor the American tradition of overconsumption. Our throw-away society has always offended me. I don’t like finding litter polluting our land and water. On I-40 West tonight, I cursed the person driving a blue truck because an empty plastic WalMart bag flew out of the bed. I didn’t speed up and shoot him, so I guess I’m a pacifist terrorist.

Does my dog think I’m a terrorist? I took him today for a bath, nail trim and anal gland cleansing. I made him wait for some scraps of salmon as I ate. Is he embarrassed when we walk in the neighborhood picking up plastic water bottles left behind by our neighbors? Probably not, as he is lying contentedly beside me as I blog.

I know my husband occasionally thinks I’m a terrorist. Just observe him when I serve cabbage or some other leafy green vegetable or when I leave a pile of his clean laundry for him to fold. John can be a terrorist when it comes to smoking. He’s now the happiest man on the planet as most restaurants and bowling centers are smoke-free.

I know that some of my coworkers think I’m a terrorist. Don’t leave me hanging when there’s a deadline due. And I’m known as the litter nazi in the office. We also have a kitchen nazi. Both of us are non-violent people.

Am I a terrorist? I can be sarcastic or say something cruel, but I can’t be physically violent. I have never physically harmed anyone or anything. I don’t own a gun, although I don’t care if you own one and use it responsibly.

Why am I wondering if I am a terrorist? Because Michelle Obama is being played in the media as a terrorist that is why. Did she invade a country and kill lots of its citizens? Does she advocate flying airplanes into buildings? If her husband wins the presidency, will she conduct a 21st century war on poverty? Or a jihad against litter?

Does she litter?

Litterers, you are the terrorists. You’re destroying our planet. Isn’t that what terrorists do? Destroy. Please don’t litter.


1 Response so far »

  1. 1

    bobbonet said,

    I don’t understand why people are so blind to the problems we are facing… Thanks for standing and doing something.

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